PHOENIX — It is commonplace for those in the early stages of life to look to their elders for advice on the world they are entering and everything around them. Depending on the structure of one’s family, it can be any relative who becomes a guiding light during childhood and early life.
In my life, no one outside of my mother, Alicia, played a more significant role in this capacity than my grandfather, Rudy Zepeda. From the moment my mom and I moved back to Houston shortly after my birth in St. Louis, she tasked Rudy to spend as much time with me as possible. With my dad living thousands of miles away in New York City, my mom made it clear how important it was for me to have a male figure in my life from an early age.
There was one problem, though. At the time, my grandfather was still serving Harris County, the largest county by population in Texas and one of the largest in the country, as a sheriff’s deputy. His job required long hours, including late nights, weekends, and even holidays if emergencies arose. His decades of service had earned him a substantial salary, but as much as he loved the job, he felt it was time to take a step back — not because he gained a lack of enjoyment in his career, but because of me.
“My daughter was the person I always looked out for and tried to provide for much of my life,” Rudy said. “But I felt that with her being home, it was important for me to pour that investment into you.”
And he did. In 2007, Rudy decided to take a pay cut and move into a more administrative role within the sheriff’s department. Around the same time, my mom and I moved into our first home in South Houston. Rudy made it a priority to spend time with me, nurturing my interests. Whether it was trips to Galveston Island or local sporting events, my grandfather went out of his way to help me engage with the world around me.
“It was definitely hard with your autism at times to get you to leave the house,” Rudy said jokingly. “All I tried to do was show you the things I loved to do in my free time and see if you’d enjoy them as a young boy like I did.”
Perhaps the most meaningful way Rudy shared his world with me was by taking me to experience his neighborhood firsthand. My grandparents raised their three children, including my mother, in the Denver Harbor neighborhood of Houston, located just 10 minutes east of downtown. For reference, it’s five minutes from the Third Ward neighborhood, the birthplace of a recent Houston icon: the late George Floyd.
Denver Harbor is a predominantly Mexican American neighborhood. The median household income is around $48,000 a year, and many families have lived there for generations, passing down their homes. That was the case for my family, and Rudy believed it was essential for me to witness and experience life in Denver Harbor, as he had as a child in the 1950s and 1960s and as his children did in the 1980s.
“It truly is home for me, and I’m so glad it has been for our family all these years,” Rudy said. “Because of that love for the area, I felt the need to expose you to Denver Harbor as much as possible.”
And he did. As a child, I became familiar with the servers at local restaurants in the area, and I even had the same barber as my grandfather. He took me there nearly three times a year, and that barber watched me grow up. And after almost every visit to the community our family calls home, he would remind me that I was always welcome there, even if I wasn’t living in the neighborhood.
“All I hoped to do was make you not only feel at home but also be grateful,” Rudy said. “As much as I love it, it wasn’t the safest community for me or your mother growing up. I hoped you could see the humility in accepting where home is for you.”
I certainly did. Being a Houstonian is something I have never taken for granted. But thanks to my grandfather, I have an even deeper appreciation for him and my family, who lived in those
conditions for much of their lives. It is a lesson in humility and gratitude — one that I am deeply grateful to have learned from the man known by his co-workers as “Sheriff Rudy.”
