“The best advice I would tell you is to go for it.”
These words of my maternal grandmother, Marsha Rickless, whom I know as Grammy, have subconsciously stuck with me for as long as I can remember. At 79 years old, Grammy is retired and lives comfortably in a Massachusetts suburb with my grandfather, Sonny, and their dog, Mindy. Her life is simple and quiet, enjoying Mojang with friends during the week and New England Patriots football with Papa on Sundays. While she lives in peace with no regrets today, she looks back on her past with curiosity, wondering how some of her decisions may have changed her life.
“I got married when I was 21,” Rickless recalled. “I think if I had my life to live over again, I’d, of course, still marry the same man, but I think I’d like to have had a few more years where I might’ve traveled, seen a little more of the world and gotten some more world experience.”
My mother once told me she sees much of her youngest son (me) in her mother. While Grammy and I share several interests and passions, how we spent our young twenties is vastly different. I’ve never been in any romantic relationship, let alone marriage. Still, at 22, I’ve explored all across the United States and graduated to the international realm with a three-week study abroad program in Paris last summer. While we went about our young adulthood much differently thus far, I like to think Gram has lived vicariously through me in my adventures, as her passion for life and those she loves flows like our shared blood through my veins no matter where I find myself.
“To your generation, I would love to be able to pass on how important it is to be compassionate and caring,” Rickless said. “Give of yourself more than you’d expect to get back.”
Everywhere I go, I carry this love passed on through my grandmother. While she was able to turn it into a family by age 23, I project mine through my love for life in general. Through my many passions, I seek to fulfill myself and everyone I come into contact with until I can share it exclusively with somebody else and hopefully pass it on to children of my own one day. Grammy sought the same thing, and while she found the person she loved most earlier than I did, she never stopped sharing her compassion through her warm hugs and delicious brownies.
Although I have not received much love outside of my family thus far in life, her philosophies have inspired me to always seek to spread positivity wherever possible. We’re the same in who we are but different in how we show it. She did it in starting and nurturing a family, and I did it in traveling, but we ultimately share in our love for giving love. And if that’s the one thing I inherited from her, that root has the potential to sprout into a beautiful new family tree down the road.
